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There is such thing as taking a healthy interest in your partner’s life.

If your partner seems to keep you compartmentalized from certain areas of their life, this might be a red flag for dishonesty.Similarly, if, on a regular basis, your partner refuses to discuss other aspects of their day, keeping details of his or her whereabouts or activities from you, this could be indicative of a greater problem.If they are unwilling to share even the most benign details of their life with you, how are you to connect on a more intimate level? Now, there is a difference between being a private person and being secretive.Perhaps your partner likes to have an hour or two of quiet after work; maybe texts coming or going late at night aren’t appreciated—these might be signs of a person who prioritizes time alone rather than a person who’s living a double life.There are 100 reasons your partner’s persona can shift, even dramatically.

Before diving into the bottomless pool of worst-case scenarios, decide if an event has flipped their world upside-down. Trauma—in any form—can do crazy things to our sense of well-being, so it’s best to tread lightly while you figure out the source.When faced with a problem, you partner will unload responsibility to any one other than him or herself.They’ll talk around the issue instead of addressing it in a direct manner.Does your body ever register fear when your partner erupts? Bring the issue to light through calm, assertive conversations when you’re both in a and see if the issue can be remedied.If you are answering ‘yes’ to any of these questions, you may need to take a step back from the situation to observe your partner’s patterns. If you discover it can not, removing yourself from the relationship may be the best thing for your mental and spiritual well-being, as well as your physical safety.The lure and sparkle of a partnership can blind us to areas of incompatibility or relationship red flags.